Sunday, September 6, 2009

Ambivalence and Valence

Image ripped off avesonprojectsc1

Had a nice time out with Robert, Laurie, and Ken last night. They are always refreshing because, like D___ in Tulsa, they are above the quarter-life crises bullshit. Though I'd like to think of myself in that way, I'm not really there yet. I'd like to grasp and live the idea that Robert posed: "An artist is simply a lover of life." But then Mary Oliver comes to mind: "Don't love your life too much."

The conflict in my feelings toward transcendentalism and humanism is reflected in my ambivalence toward high brow and blue collar literature.

Whitman was both, though he used loose structure.
William Carlos Williams claimed to speak in colloquial language, though his concepts were all but.
Hunter S. Thompson ever was a satire of reality in order to better hold a mirror to reality.
Rilke was transcendent and humanistic, not blue collar.
Lorca was high brow, other worldly, though he wished to write of the p
Salinger may fit all the above because he somehow managed to talk about it all with and without his tongue in cheek.
Dostoevsky was all.
O'Connor was all.

As in other areas of life, to be honest is to be. I shouldn't think of molding myself, but should be myself.

Over the last 10 years, the three closest to me in friendship and geographical proximity have all been over the age of 60. They're above the ambition, relationship drama, idea of cool, etc.

Maybe I'm closer than I think. Maybe I should stop thinking.

"A dissonance
in the valence of Uranium
led to the discovery

(if you are interested)
leads to discovery"

From William Carlos Willaims' Patterson


  1. I think it's cool that you take time out to think about these things. And it's done not out of pretension, but out of a healthy awareness and recognition of life.

    Selfishly speaking, I'm glad you have the friends you do--friends that can just "be" and can relax and enjoy a night of free opera and then joke about the fact that the diner has nothing on the menu.

    You're in good company and I'm sure they feel the same way:)

  2. "but should be myself."

    I believe you have it.

  3. Ohmygoshko: I love my friends and you. That diner sucked!

    Sundance: thanks, brother.

  4. I agree with you, you're closer than you think.

    But don't stop thinking. I like the idea of blue-collar transcendentalism.

  5. Yeah, Andrew, there is something there. If I get it right, or even close to right, it'll be good

  6. [re cameo]

    Fortune, if any, lasts only a lifetime; fame rarely lasts longer. For many, the creative process becomes simply a love affair with that process.

    For the record, I think being in love with life raises the question: Are we in love with its source or its show?